Shifting gears

Hello! As I sit here doing some winter computer work, I realized that I haven’t written a blog post in 10 months. Which is more than a little pathetic. I could say I’ve been busy (I have) or that I got distracted (I did) but I think the reality is that I haven’t prioritized my blog. I frequently feel like I have things to say and things to share but I don’t prioritize the actual action of sharing those things and that is a disservice to me. Whether or not anyone reads this is not important. The important part is that I feel productive and good about my sharing.

Many of you won’t know that I used to dream of being a journalist. I dreamt about writing as my career. I have always felt good about my writing. Words flow out of my brain and onto the page so easily for me. A double-side Christmas letter take me an hour to write. But when I started exploring journalism as a career during my freshman year of college, I quickly realized that the lifestyle of a journalist isn’t what I wanted.

I didn’t want to be sucked into a story and overloaded with files and phone calls to chase down a lead. I didn’t want to be operating on a perpetual stress-inducing deadline. I didn’t want the controversy that may be associated with some of my stories. Really, I wanted a quiet and peaceful life full of family and children and that was very easy to imagine when I met my (now) husband at the age of 19.

Some people are meant to do big and public things. Their heart’s desire is to conquer their chosen career path or explore the unknown or push themselves to the brink. My great goal in life is to raise the best children that i can and to be the best human I can. When I die, I want to be proud of my family and have as few regrets in my heart as possible. And to know that I brought a little bit of joy into this world would be an ok thing too. :)

I guess what I’m realizing is that I also still have a need to share my stories. The sharing and writing looks different than I thought it would when I was 18 years old but that’s growth in life, right? Now, I need to raise my 3 beautiful kiddos, grow my beautiful flowers, love my family and perhaps along the way, write down a blog post or two.